A Border Patrol agent is on duty. He spots two Mexicans and runs them down.
They show him their papers (he thinks they are phony).
He tells them, "O.K. I have a test for you. I want you to use the words
'cheese' and 'liver' in a sentence."
So, the first guy says, "I made a liver and cheese sandwich for lunch."
The agent says, "That was good, you can go. What about you?" he asks the
second guy.

He says, "Liver alone. Cheese mine."

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A blind man is walking down the street with his seeing-eye dog one day.
They come to a busy intersection and the dog, ignoring the high volume of
traffic zooming by on the street, leads the blind man right out into the
thick of the traffic. This is followed by the screech of tires and horns
blaring as panicked drivers try desperately not to run the pair down.
The blind man and the dog finally reach the safety of the sidewalk on the
other side of the street and the blind man pulls a cookie out of his coat
pocket which he offers to the dog. A passerby, having observed the near
fatal incident, can't control his amazement and says to the blind man,
"Why on earth are you rewarding your dog with a cookie? He nearly got you
killed!" The blind man turns partially in his direction
and replies, "To find out where his head is, so I can kick his ass."