Confucious Say....

• "Man who run in front of car get tired"
• "Man who run behind car get exhausted"
• "Man with one hand in pocket not necessarily jingling change"
• "To prevent hangover stay drunk!"
• "Passionate kiss like spiders web - soon lead to undoing of fly."
• "Virginity like bubble. One prick - all gone!"
• "Foolish man give wife grand piano. Wise man gives wife upright organ."
• "Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok
• "Man with one chopstick go hungry."
• "Man trapped in whore house get jerked around."
• "Man who scratches ass should not bite fingernails."
• "Man who eat many prunes get good run for money."
• "Man with hand in pocket is having a ball."
• "Baseball is wrong. Man with four balls cannot walk!"
• "Panties not best thing on earth, but next to it."
• "Woman who wear G-string, high on crack!"
• "War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left."
• "Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house."
• "Man who sleep in cat house by day, sleep in doghouse by night."
• "Man who fight with wife all day, get no piece at night!"
• "If you park, don't drink, accidents cause people."
• "Man who tell one too many light bulb jokes soon burn out!"
• "It takes many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it."
• "Man who eat many prunes, sit on toilet many moons."
• "Man who drive like hell, bound to get there!"
• "Man who sit on tack get point!"
• "Man who stand on toilet is high on pot!"
• "Man who lives in glass house should change in basement"
• "Boy who go to bed with sexual problem wake up with problem in hand
• "He who fishes in other man's well often catches crabs."
• "People who make Confucius joke speak bad English."